


nothing more than a rat

by justanonlinelove



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:47:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27352204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanonlinelove/pseuds/justanonlinelove
Summary: this is just me writing to myself because i needed to get it out of my head. like i'm talking pure uncensored thoughts it's kind of a problem lmao major major major trigger warning!!





	nothing more than a rat

fuck you. 

you're a disappointment. you will never be good enough. you don't deserve anything that you have.

you were doing so well, huh? you only thought you were making progress. it's bullshit. you were only giving yourself hope, dumbass. setting yourself up to fail. you were never going to be good enough anyway. you never have been, so why would you be now? all you are is a failure, you should have accepted that earlier.

you should have listened to the thoughts that told you to lay down in the middle of the street. you don't deserve painless.

you need to stop eating. you're stupid and fat. if you keep eating, you'll keep gaining weight. stop gaining weight. you need to exercise more, remember? you'll survive without lunch, stop eating. if you were really good enough you wouldn't be scared to throw up. your phobias are nonsensical and dumb, grow up.

nobody will ever truly love you. not the unmedicated you- the real you. you, with a diagnosis that sends people running. nobody loves you. and that's fine, right? it's not like you deserve love anyway. you are nothing more than everyone's second choice. you honestly don't even deserve that.

you are selfish. all you do is want. you don't deserve her, you don't deserve them. you are only going to hurt everyone around you in the end. you always do.

you're stupid and good for nothing. nobody wants you around, genius. surprised you haven't realized that yet. 

please just die already. it's easier than this.


End file.
